Today, I head back to the OR for the next step in the reconstruction of my hand. For some reason, impending surgical procedures seem to bring out my more reflective side. Perhaps that is because each time I undergo “the knife,” I am reminded of how miraculous it is that I still have my right hand. This time is no different. It has been 21 months since the accident took place, but for me, it seems like just yesterday. I remember the terror I felt as I realized I had nearly severed my hand. I remember my life flashing through my mind as I waited for medical personnel to show up to the scene. I remember wondering if I was going to make it through the coming hours. I remember wanting to protect my children from the horror I was experiencing. I remember trying to remain calm, hoping that they would not realize the seriousness of the situation. And I remember the pain–the excruciating pain that seemed like it might go on forever.
As I look at my hand today, however, all I see are miracles. The very fact that I have a right hand is miraculous in and of itself, but that is only the beginning. I have spent the past few weeks engaged in activities that I once thought I would never do again: sewing a formal gown for my daughter, baking breads, decorating cakes and cookies, photographing my loved ones…and perhaps most importantly…making music.
One moment in particular stands out when I think back to the beginning of this ordeal. As my surgeon was preparing to rebuild my wrist, he told us that he was going to have to fuse it in order to save my hand. My husband was unwilling to accept this as an answer. He explained to Dr. Schaub that I was a violinist and if he fused my wrist, I would never play again. My surgeon agreed to try to rebuild it, not making any promises, but willing to give it a try. Before going into surgery, I was given a blessing by two men who hold the priesthood and have the power to act in God’s name. I was promised that the surgery would be a success and I would play the violin again someday. There has been a lot of concern over whether or not my wrist would collapse, and that is still a concern, even today. But the surgery was successful, and while I am far from the place I was before the accident, I have picked up the violin and begun to play once again. As I head into surgery today, I share this video with you as a reminder that miracles do happen…I’m living proof of it!